Dallas's Blog

As we lie under the dark night sky

Talking about different aspirations I think it’s all a lie

What were you thinking

We fell asleep and stopped blinking

Together we stay

The memory will last forever of this day.

Morning birds chirp different songs

Nothing’s wrong when we’re where we belong

Nothing new but the morning dew

I believe you

About what you said is true

Experiences always come out new

If you’re leaving, I’m coming too

A relationship would be restraining us

We are much more than some pointless lust

At least that’s how I feel

I don’t know if you think this is real

I’m gaining some doubts

But I’m too shy to even open up my mouth

You’re leaving and I’m not coming

I knew you lied and I messed up for loving

What was the point of wasting my time

I’m grabbin and loading the 9

One bullet would ease my life

Close my eyes and I’m gone no surprise

Epidemic

School today was odd, a lot of people just didn’t seem right. Everyone was acting slow and out of it but I guess it could just be a Monday thing. Man, I hate Mondays, let alone school in general. I feel like people take this whole high school thing way too seriously. I mean, I understand the preppy kids who are just trying to get their work done and the obnoxious kids who just don’t care but the people in the middle are the people I just can’t stand. The average student at my school I bet is a lot worse than yours.

Everyday after school I have to wait for the 37 bus and it takes FOREVER to get here. There is usually the same people at my bus stop everyday but today I see a group I haven’t seen here before. I saw a couple of them acting strange earlier, they seem sort of shady. They’re walking up to me, why are they coming up to me? “What’s up man?” the guy in front shouted out, “Not much just waiting for the bus” I reply. “True, you take the 37?” He asks like he also rides this bus. “Yeah do you?” “Not usually but today I am, I gotta go to the suppliers house.” The supplier? Supplier for what? Why would this guy think I know who that is? “True.” I say just to make it not awkward. “Yeah I’m on the last of what I got right now.” I’m still puzzled to what he’s talking about. “Of what?” I ask. He shakes his head almost in a state of daze, “Oh… You’ll understand eventually.”

Maybe this is why people have been acting so strange, Mondays never really seem that weird. Whatever, they ain’t even on the bus this morning but I doubt I’d get any answers from them anyways. Hopefully school will be back to normal today.

“What’s going on with those kids?” I hear a voice I haven’t heard before and turn my head. “This is all pretty new to me.” I realized it’s the new girl who came in late yesterday. The teacher, Mr. Morris definitely did not appreciate that. He gave us a whole entire lecture on how being late you’re first day will get you nowhere in life. “Hello?” She asks, “You there?!” “Oh, sorry, I space out sometimes.” She looked at me calmly, but seemed as if she was almost amazed I spoke, “Don’t worry about it.” I figure I should probably respond because these people have been acting pretty weird again today. “People have been like this since yesterday, just not as many.” She looks back at me oddly, “So this isn’t normal?” “No, people are always whack around here but it’s never like this.” She sheds a quick laugh, “What’s your name?”

“Mac but I don’t really like the name Mac, you can just call me Vortex.”

“Vortex?” She asks.

“Yeah it’s my last name but I like it better than my first.”

“Alright than Vortex, I’m Hope.”

“Where the hell is this bus?” Crowds of people at my bus stop are seeming to get rowdy. “I could walk home before the bus even gets here!” One guy yells. “Then why don’t you walk?” I hear that voice from earlier, it’s Hope, casually walking towards the bus stop. She takes a seat next to me and takes her headphones out. The kids who were yelling all started to calm down, it’s like she has mind control powers or something. “What’s up?” “Not much, just waiting for the bus.” She looks at me blankly, “Well obviously, why else would you be sitting here? You should really work on your conversation skills.” I feel a quick burst of shock, “Sorry, I just don’t talk that much, I don’t really like anyone at this school so I stick to myself.” “Do you not like me?” She asks. “Well if that was the case I wouldn’t be talking to you, would I?” She looks reassured, “You’re quite the character Vortex,” She says. The bus is pulling up to the stop, I pick up my bags and look back at hope. “See ya!” she says. “Oh do you take the 38?” She looks and smiles as I’m walking onto the bus, “No! My mom picks me up!” She yells to make sure I can hear through the tinted glass windows, “I just wanted to talk to you!”

I arrive to school the next day and immediately think what the hell is going on? Why is all of this happening so fast? This is completely fucked. What is the point of even being here? Should I leave or stay? My mind is racing, people keep asking if i want a dose. There’s hope, she looks normal, I need to talk to her.

“Are you seeing this?” She yells.

“Yeah this is nuts, what should we do?”

“Let’s get outta here.”

We head out through the backdoor behind the gym and walk far away from the school. “What should we do now?” I ask as I lean over on a tall oak tree. “Let’s just keep going.” Confused and tired of walking I ask her, “Did people offer that stuff to you too?” She looks at me almost instantly “Yeah they did, I kept rejecting it but I got some from one kid.” “YOU WHAT?!” I respond, “Why would you want that stuff?” I’m realizing I probably don’t know her as well as I thought. “I’m just trying to figure out what it is, people were calling it Vlatin.” I’m flabbergasted, “So?” “I’m gonna try it, I wanna see what the hype is.” She says. “Are you sure?” I ask her. “Yeah, it’s not like one time will turn you into a junkie or anything.” That is true, maybe she’s right. “Alright I’ll do it too than.” She then handed me a clump of this weird looking yellow substance.

As soon as I ate it I felt an instant rush. I knew I didn’t want to be doing this, but I did, and I did it for her.

Pick and Choose

It’s my dumb luck

Planting roots

Falling out of the tree

Open woundsdig down slowly

Bones turn cold

Empty thoughts in turn

Rake in wealth

Destroy the tree

Empty Storm

The sky turned all black

Clouds are the blank witnesses

Who knows what happened

Choose Carefully

“What do you want to be when you grow up?” I don’t know about you, but I’ve always hated getting asked that question. How am I supposed to be able to justify the outcome of my life when I’m still so young? Dreams from your childhood end up fading away, hopes get crushed, hearts end up broken. Life throws a lot of different obstacles at you and your outlook on something could be totally flipped in a matter of seconds.

Just like any other winter day, today was cold and gloomy. The overcast clouds set the mood for students at school. It was clear that people were lacking the energy they once had before the sun went into hiding. Everyone seems to be having the life drained out of them, including me.

We began this future career project in AVID yesterday and I’m still stuck at the beginning. I can’t choose a career, there’s countless to choose from and none of them sound appealing. I feel like I’m not very suited for most careers and I don’t want to pick something I won’t be happy doing. I can only think of one thing: Music.

I’m a bit too shy, a bit too embarrassed, and a bit too nervous to even tell my teacher that’s what I want to do. It’s a college prep class and the career I want to pursue doesn’t really even involve college in my mind. I’ve grown up and lived with music my whole life, it’s definitely something I’m familiar with and something that I enjoy. So without any second thought, when I got home, I immediately began writing my first song.

It took me about 10 minutes to find a free beat that I liked off of YouTube before I started to write. I’ve listened to enough music to be able to distinguish good from bad and just the beat alone can sway the opinion of the listeners. I also knew that if I want to be taken seriously I can’t have any fake flexing lyrics. With all of this in mind, I let my ideas run wild.

After about two hours of work, my song was complete and I had practiced it over and over until I believed it was perfect and ready to show to people. Me and my friend Gavin are always talking about music together, we’re both into the same styles and the same artists so it would make sense to show him first. Even being the anxious person I am, I was excited to show not just Gavin, but all of my friends. I was actually proud of my work, which is a feeling I wasn’t really too familiar with.

After school the next day I went over to Gavin’s house and performed it for him. Whilst I was doing my verses, I could see him getting more and more hyped after each line as the bass rattled the house. By the end of the song, Gavin looked like he had seen a ghost. He told me that I can’t just waste my talent and that I need to keep making more songs, so I did.

Ever since I wrote my first song it feels like the sun finally came out. Music has heavily changed my life by making me happier and keeping my perspective on things as creative as possible. After getting my head wrapped around the fact that anyone will be able to listen to my songs, I lost the sense of embarrassment and have became more relaxed. Last year I would have replied with a shrug, now I can happily say “I want to be a musician!”