1. Just because you get clean in the shower doesn’t mean your shower is clean. The shower is a dirty, disgusting place unless you scrub it yourself.
3. If you leave your laundry in the dryer for too long, the wrinkles will remain there until you wash those clothes again.
4. Oh, you have the flu? Need to fix a toothache? Is it time for your annual check up? You’re going to have to make those doctor’s appointments, they haven’t been made for you.
5. You will begin to dread the day of the month when your bank emails you a “friendly reminder” to pay your credit card bill.
6. A dishwasher will save you hours of time and energy.
7. Never buy groceries alone. They will go bad quicker than you anticipate.
8. A light bulb blew out? Not going to turn on again until you call the super or install it yourself.
9. Home cooked meals sound fun in theory, but in reality take hours and never taste quite as good as your mom’s.
10. Dry clean only? What the hell is dry clean only?
11. Trader Joe’s should be your new house of worship. Their price motto is “all our items are on sale, day in and day out.”
12. Receiving a letter in the mail is no longer $20 from grandma for your birthday/Christmas/graduation. Now they are bills, junk mail and more bills.
13. A morning cup of coffee is one of the most expensive habits you can acquire.
14. Since you’re an adult, your parents will stop signing your name on birthday/holiday/thank you cards. You’re now responsible for writing those yourself.
15. You’ll beg your parents to stay on their Verizon family plan. If you don’t, watching the data rack up is torture.
16. Internet connection is a precious and valuable commodity. Coincidentally, when that internet is faulty, being on hold with Comcast/Time Warner/Verizon/AT&T will be the bane of your existence.
17. Being healthy is a luxury. Gym memberships, organic food and vitamins are extremely expensive. Bright side? You can’t afford food.
18. You’ll start to think of prices in terms of hours you work. That new sweater you want? Not worth eight hours at your desk.
19. What’s that rancid smell coming from the kitchen? Oh, it’s the trash that’s been full to the brim that you haven’t taken out for two weeks.