Healthy Relationships Men’s/Women’s group

10/16

Free event at the park block using light call BEAM https://www.artcityeugene.com/beam

What’s preventing you from finding love?

Life as a single person offers many rewards, such as being free to pursue your own hobbies and interests, learning how to enjoy your own company, and appreciating the quiet moments of solitude. However, if you’re ready to share your life with someone and want to build a lasting, worthwhile relationship, life as a single person can also be frustrating.

For many of us, our emotional baggage can make finding the right romantic partner a difficult journey. Perhaps you grew up in a household where there was no role model of a solid, healthy relationship and you doubt that such a thing even exists. Or maybe your dating history consists only of brief flings and you don’t know how to make a relationship last. You could be attracted to the wrong type of person or keep making the same bad choices over and over, due to an unresolved issue from your past. Ot maybe you’re not putting yourself in the best environments to meet the right person, or that when you do, you don’t feel confident enough. Whatever the case may be, you can overcome your obstacles and find a healthy romantic relationship.

What is a healthy relationship?

A healthy relationship is when two people develop a connection based on:

  • Mutual respect
  • Trust
  • Honesty
  • Support
  • Fairness/equality
  • Separate identities
  • Good communication
  • A sense of playfulness/fondness

Reassess your misconceptions about dating and relationships

Expectations about dating and finding love

When we start looking for a long-term partner or enter into a romantic relationship, many of us do so with a predetermined set of (often unrealistic) expectations—such as how the person should look and behave, how the relationship should progress, and the roles each partner should fulfill. These expectations may be based on your family history, influence of your peer group, your past experiences, or even ideals portrayed in movies and TV shows. Retaining many of these unrealistic expectations can make any potential partner seem inadequate and any new relationship feel disappointing.

Consider what’s really important

Distinguish between what you want and what you need in a partner. Wants are negotiable, needs are not.

Wants include things like occupation, intellect, and physical attributes such as height, weight, and hair color. Even if certain traits seem crucially important at first, over time you’ll often find that you’ve been needlessly limiting your choices. For example, it may be more important to find someone who is:

  • Curious rather than extremely intelligent. Curious people tend to grow smarter over time, while those who are bright may languish intellectually if they lack curiosity.
  • Sensual rather than sexy.
  • Caring rather than beautiful or handsome.
  • A little mysterious rather than glamorous.
  • Humorous rather than wealthy.
  • From a family with similar values to yours, rather than someone from a specific ethnic or social background.

Needs are different than wants in that needs are those things that matter to you most, such as values, ambitions, or goals in life. These are probably not the things you can find out about a person by eyeing them on the street, reading their profile on a dating site, or sharing a quick cocktail at a bar before last call.

What feels right to you?

When looking for lasting love, forget what looks right, forget what you think should be right, and forget what your friends, parents, or other people think is right, and ask yourself: Does the relationship feel right

Expectations (agreed upon in class):

Whats said in guys/girls group class, stays in guys/girls group class . 

If sensitive topics discussed – leave discreetly, or turn off video and/or mute conversation and rejoin when you feel ready. 

Respectful of others, and their opinions. We will be discussing some topics that may trigger emotions that make you feel uncomfortable. 

Don’t interrupt the teacher or person talking. Respect turn-taking (especially in ZOOM meetings) .  

Don’t “HOG” the class or meeting time, allow others to share their opinions. 

 

Class went over number 1 and 2 of the “Relationships chart”.  See below. 

FUN FOR THE WEEKEND

First Friday Artweek

October 2, 2020 to October 9, 2020
Downtown Eugene

To reduce crowding and allow for safe social distancing, we are expanding the ArtWalk experience from one night to a full week. Come downtown to enjoy Eugene’s art scene and support local artists, October 2-9! We will not host a guided tour, but you can check out a list of open venues and art exhibitions below. BRING Recycling 4446 Franklin Blvd, Eugene, OR 97403  (Website) Hours: Monday-Saturday, 9am-5pm; Sunday, 10am-5pm BRING challenged designers to visit on August 1 to comb through a prearranged selection of materials and pick out whatever called to them for the annual Product Design Challenge. Designers’ selections were documented with “before” photos (right) so that the community can see each amazing transformation. Some of the materials chosen include: Plexiglas triangles, iron fencing, “Houdini” crate on wheels, woven plastic “Super Sack,” roll-up cork, old mattress springs, cabinets, and lots of oak planks.  Stop by to see the final products created by these designers!

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